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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26100781">don't let teens pilot canoes</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/thedarkestnightwillend/pseuds/thedarkestnightwillend'>thedarkestnightwillend</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Les Misérables (2012), Les Misérables - All Media Types, Les Misérables - Schönberg/Boublil, Les Misérables - Victor Hugo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Summer Camp, Fluff, M/M, a river monster is involved, as well as technically three eyed foxes, does this count as a fantasy au?, sure</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 05:34:14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,428</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26100781</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/thedarkestnightwillend/pseuds/thedarkestnightwillend</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>I hear Bahorel screaming something indiscernible, and struggle to listen while trying to guide the canoe away from any particularly sharp objects sticking out of the frothing water around us.<br/>“Bahorel, I have no idea what you’re saying!” I shout back at him, finally looking up. I see him pointing to something wriggling up ahead, just rising above the water. I squint to make out what it is, amidst the glittering water. I finally can tell what he’s saying, and feel Enjolras freeze up in front of me.<br/>“It’s a river monster, dude!” I nearly snap my paddle in half.</p><p>(A Lumberjanes AU? Kinda silly but it was fun to write lol. If you don't know what Lumberjanes is, you don't have to know much to read this don't worry. I'm pretty sure this can just work as a summer camp AU, but I did use a specific chapter of the first book for the plot)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Enjolras/Grantaire (Les Misérables)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>don't let teens pilot canoes</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>So, this camp is </span>
  <em>
    <span>interesting. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Like, only a little crazier than I imagined, but still weird. I knew I took a chance when I signed up to be a counselor, but then again, I didn’t think my application would get accepted. For God’s sake, I typed it in </span>
  <em>
    <span>Comic Sans. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Blame Bahorel for that one. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And </span>
  <em>
    <span>also</span>
  </em>
  <span> maybe blame him for telling me that Enjolras was applying. My gay ass couldn’t resist, I guess. I also need volunteer hours to graduate. So. Blame that too. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The situation at hand, though. The wild part of this camp is that we </span>
  <em>
    <span>definitely </span>
  </em>
  <span>met some strange foxes last night. Beyond the fact that they had three eyes, they definitely were like, rabid or something too. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Okay, here’s how it went. I was woken up at some ungodly hour by Bahorel— he happens to be the other counselor in my cabin, which was a </span>
  <em>
    <span>very</span>
  </em>
  <span> unwise decision— who was saying he got a text from Courfeyrac to meet the squad by the Big Big Tree. (Creative naming on Marius’ part). </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So we met them, with Bahorel wearing a blanket cape for the ‘aesthetic’, because Courfeyrac heard a bunch of campers talking about a ghost in the forest at dinner. And he believed them. </span>
  <span>We didn’t find a ghost, evidently, but we did fight off possibly rabid three eyed foxes because Courfeyrac and Bahorel brought beef jerky along. l will never get those hours of my life back, but I think I’m okay with it. I heard Enjolras curse for the first time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This morning, though. It is 8:30 AM on a Tuesday and I am learning how to canoe three hours before I teach a bunch of eleven year olds how to do the same thing. Which doesn't sound dangerous. Not at all. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Bahorel leans over to me as we listen to Camp Director Valjean teach us the right technique for paddling so we don’t splash water everywhere or turn around in circles or something. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don’t seem tired at all,” I yawn and he snickers. I know I look like death incarnate, he doesn’t need to remind me.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well thank Courfeyrac for that, then,” I reply saltily. Bahorel badly hides a cackle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Valjean notices, because he notices everything. The man might have eyes in the back of his head, but I just think Bahorel isn’t that subtle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mr. Bahorel, do you have something to share?” He asks, sticking the oar previously in his hands into the ground and crossing his arms. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, no,” Bahorel straightens, “Sir.” Valjean nods.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good. Anyway,” He continues, and I really try to listen this time. I do </span>
  <em>
    <span>kind of </span>
  </em>
  <span>want to not drown. It’s a very low standard, I know.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After about two more minutes of Valjean explaining how to turn, stop, and not fall over, Valjean tells us we’re going the ‘easy route’ so we don’t get lost. He then splits us into four groups.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, Combeferre, Courfeyrac, and Jehan in Group One,” Valjean reads off of a faded yellow sticky note. “Bossuet, Joly, and Musichetta, Group Two. Marius, Feuilly, and Cosette, Group Three.” I can see Marius reddening already. And then, my stomach sinks realizing who I’m left with.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Group Four, Grantaire, Bahorel, and Enjolras. I will be in the boat with the red stripe, make sure you look for me if you somehow get into trouble. Find your group and head to your canoe!” I look to Bahorel. He smiles giddily. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Quite the group we have. Isn’t this going to be fun?” I jab him in the stomach with my elbow. I walk the dock to the end, Bahorel continuously teasing me quietly, and take a left to find the canoe. It has a faded and peeling </span>
  <em>
    <span>#4 </span>
  </em>
  <span>on the side in a nice shade of mustard yellow. I carefully drop into the boat, sitting quickly. I choose the back, and Bahorel sits in the very front. Leaving Enjolras to sit directly in front of me.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I make quick eye contact with Bahorel before Enjolras can notice, and shoot him the iciest glare possible. He gives me a thumbs up, grinning. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With everyone in their seats and wearing the most uncomfortable life vests in existence, Valjean tells us to follow him in backwards order, meaning we go first. We take off pretty easily, which is very lucky given that this is the worst trio imaginable.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Grantaire,” Enjolras starts, “You keep knocking your paddle into mine. Keep up with the pattern.” I wait for a full rotation of rowing, and try to keep the rhythm. We keep up nicely for a few more minutes. We take one turn, and I start to hear a strange rumbling sound. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, Mr. Valjean, do you hear that?” I shout. He looks up from his map. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, what is it?” He replies, looking closely at the paper, and paddling occasionally so as to keep the pace for everyone else. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Some weird grumble sound just ahead, is there construction or something nearby?” I ask. Valjean almost shakes his head, and flips the map around once.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hypothetically, no, there shouldn’t be anything mechanical for miles. However, I’m not actually sure I took the right turn.” He says. Courfeyrac groans from behind me.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ugh, are you saying we’re lost?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No. I just took the wrong turn.” Valjean answers decisively. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So yes, we are lost.” I turn around, looking to Courfeyrac.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I thought you said we took the easy route, </span>
  <em>
    <span>specifically</span>
  </em>
  <span> so we wouldn’t get lost?” Bossuet chimes in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, I made a light mistake,” Valjean admits, “We can get back on track, just give me a second—” Suddenly, Bahorel shouts something.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is that a </span>
  <em>
    <span>waterfall?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Valjean starts paddling furiously in front of me in an effort to turn around, shouting at us to follow suit.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Technically, those are the rapids,” Enjolras adds, very necessarily. My group starts to paddle, but the canoe keeps moving quickly forwards as we catch a current.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who cares what they are,” I answer, “We’re stuck! We’re not stopping!” I hear mixed shouts behind us, namely Valjean telling everyone to calm down, but the rumbling of the water ahead drowns them out as we move nearer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I make another small attempt to turn around or slow us down, but we’re already dropping. The canoe lurches, and we bump into the eroded rocks below. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I hear Bahorel screaming something indiscernible, and struggle to listen while trying to guide the canoe away from any particularly sharp objects sticking out of the frothing water around us.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Bahorel, I have no idea what you’re saying!” I shout back at him, finally looking up. I see him pointing to something wriggling up ahead, just rising above the water. I squint to make out what it is, amidst the glittering water. I finally can tell what he’s saying, and feel Enjolras freeze up in front of me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s a river monster, dude!” I nearly snap my paddle in half.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Are you kidding me?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” I reply, “Where the hell did it come from?” I still might as well try to not crash the canoe. Enjolras finally speaks again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t sign up for this! I am going to </span>
  <em>
    <span>die</span>
  </em>
  <span>, in a </span>
  <em>
    <span>river</span>
  </em>
  <span>, by some </span>
  <em>
    <span>supernatural force!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” He holds onto his paddle so tightly that his knuckles are turning white. “I won’t be able to see if I got accepted to any colleges, guys!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Jesus, dude, get your priorities straight.” He turns briefly to glare at me, and I make an attempt to actually fix something about the predicament. “You are not going to die, Enjolras, it’s fine!” Okay, well, at least I can say I tried. I turn to see if the others have managed to follow in our train of bad decisions and seriously unlucky canoe placement. Surely enough, Valjean is gaping open mouthed at the gigantic sea-green beast in front of him. Jehan’s canoe just managed to get into the rapids, directly behind Joly’s group. Marius and Feuilly, who are surprisingly more chaotic than my group, are shouting something at Courfeyrac about...hair ties? I go back to facing forward, and try to think of what to do.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>First, I need Enjolras to calm down, as me being the only one making decisions here is going to end in disaster. Second, Bahorel needs to stop screaming. And finally, the serpent. It hasn’t noticed us somehow, but that does depend on my ability to figure out problems one and two. Okay, go time.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Enjolras, please keep breathing!” I pat him on the shoulder, then look to Bahorel, “Bahorel, try to be quiet! The thing hasn’t noticed us yet, but it definitely will if you keep on with your volume!” Bahorel sheepishly closes his very loud mouth and waits for more instruction. Which is weird. I’ve never been left with this much power before. On cue, Enjolras stops hyperventilating for a moment to say something.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, what should we do then?” He asks. I ask for his paddle, and he hands it to me. I hold both in each hand, and somehow get the canoe lodged between two large rocks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Now we don’t have to multitask. Okay, let’s think. Have we ever met a serpent before?” Both shake their heads. “Yeah, okay. So—“ I’m interrupted by a loud screech. “God, what is that?” We all turn, covering our ears. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Our plans, whatever they were going to end up being, have been foiled. The serpent has noticed all of us, thanks to Courfeyrac throwing an oar into its neck. The thing shattered upon impact, and now the </span>
  <em>
    <span>very</span>
  </em>
  <span> large, </span>
  <em>
    <span>very</span>
  </em>
  <span> deadly river monster is </span>
  <em>
    <span>very aware </span>
  </em>
  <span>of everyone’s presence. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Get out of the rocks. Get out of the rocks!” Enjolras says immediately. “If we’re stationary, we’re an easier target, get moving guys!” I listen, and hand his oar back to him. We push off of one of the rocks, and maneuver ourselves back into moving water. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do we have a plan yet?” Bahorel shouts over the now continuous screeching of the monster as it creates huge waves. I don’t think canoes were made for this, specifically when in the hands of three inexperienced seventeen year olds.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No!” I answer simply. Enjolras goes to say something, but is interrupted by a violent rocking of the water under us. He doesn’t even have a second to restart his sentence before we are pushed into the air, and the entire canoe falls. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I find myself very thankful for the uncomfortable life vest for about two seconds after landing, and then I get pushed underwater again by a wave. I open my eyes, trying to see through the bubbles, and try to find solid ground to push up off of. After a split second of searching, I flip around and launch myself up to the surface. I tread water and spot Bahorel immediately ahead of me. He’s landed close to the canoe, which is about as lucky as you can get when it’s now in three separate pieces. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Bahorel!” I shout. “Bahorel!” He whips around as far as he can in his life vest. “Where’s Enjolras?” I ask.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I dunno, I didn’t see him underwater!” I grit my teeth, and look around again. A moment later, I see something vaguely blond floating maybe ten feet to my left. I swim over, and recognize it as Enjolras. Except, he’s not swimming. He’s just floating. Face down in the water. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh no, please no,” As fast as the thoughts came, I shove them to the back of my mind. We didn’t fall that far, and the water is maybe ten feet deep. I’m being irrational. I reach him, and tug him behind me to the nearest collection of rocks so I can figure out what the hell happened to him. I pause momentarily when I hear Courfeyrac scream something again from maybe thirty feet away, across the water.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I defeated a river serpent with a scrunchie to the </span>
  <em>
    <span>eye!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” I now understand all the talk of hair ties earlier. I watch just long enough to see the serpent disappear into the bubbling water, the waves beginning to still. I look back to Enjolras, now lying on a nice pillow of algae. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I don’t know CPR, what am I supposed to do? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“God, </span>
  <em>
    <span>think!” </span>
  </em>
  <span>I say to myself, and a second later I’m picking up a sopping wet fellow-counselor in my arms and running over to the shore to find the group. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I reach them, and when they see me, all their triumphant smiles fade. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Enjolras!” Combeferre shouts, running over to me.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t think he’s breathing, I don’t know CPR, what do I do?” I explain frantically. Combeferre has me set Enjolras on the ground, and I look to everyone else as they crowd around us. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Doesn’t it involve kissing?” Courfeyrac supplies.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean, kind of, yeah,” Jehan agrees.</span>
</p><p><span>“No, that’s proven wrong,” Joly corrects, leaning on a longer piece of driftwood. He must have lost his cane somewhere in the water. “You need to press between his ribs to the beat of</span> <span>‘Staying Alive’. You know that song, right?” I nod quickly, undoing Enjolras’ life vest so I can find where Joly means. I find the beat, and try my best.</span></p><p>
  <span>“It’s not working!” I say after a bit, thinking of what else I can possibly do without any training. Now that I think about it, I am not at </span>
  <em>
    <span>all</span>
  </em>
  <span> qualified to be a camp counselor. Whatever. I’ll figure that out later. Joly starts to say something else medical, but is cut off by Bahorel yelling something about ‘karate skills’, and landing a hard chop into Enjolras’ lungs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Enjolras sits bolt upright, coughing up a </span>
  <em>
    <span>lot </span>
  </em>
  <span>of river water. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh my God, I can’t believe that worked!” Bahorel jumps around in shocked celebration. A little alarming that he had no idea what he was doing, but he doesn’t usually know anyway. As everyone walks away to either look for any intact canoes or ask Bahorel what blessed him with the ability to do what he just did, I look to Enjolras. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you save my life?” He asks once he’s done coughing. I shake my head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, technically it was Bahorel screaming and karate chopping you in the stomach.” He laughs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Whatever, I’m saying it was you. Deal with it.” And he pulls me into a hug, smiling as wide as you can after nearly dying. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not to be super cheesy, but I think I can survive a few more weeks as a camp counselor. As long as I learn CPR and how to properly pilot a canoe.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>if you understand where i got the plot, congratulations! lumberjanes is dope and so is noelle stevenson. if you don't, that is chill, it's a comic series (ig graphic novel lol idk) written by a handful of authors, including noelle stevenson, aka the wonderful being behind she-ra: princesses of power. so, all in all, it's amazing and u should read it even tho it is definitely meant for younger audiences lmao</p><p>but anyway thank you for reading!! leave kudos and/or comment if u want to it will, as always, be greatly appreciated! &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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